Wednesday, April 30, 2014

8 SIGNIFICANT REASONS A WOMAN WANTS AND NEEDS A CONFIDENT MAN




             

  • A woman wants and needs a confident man by her side because he's able to work past his fears  while staying steady in pursuit towards his goals. Despite the obstacles in his mind, a confident man will view those doubts and mental obstacles as challenges needing to be conquered. He won't make excuses for falling short, he'll just acknowledge his failure and get right back up again.
  •  A woman definitely needs a confident man because he takes his responsibility as the head of household seriously, which surpasses his animal instincts to run wild in the streets. Forget what DMX and Aaliyah agreed on, because a woman needs a man to do more than make it back in one piece. She needs a man who will not only have enough self-discipline to stay out of the streets, but to lead his family in peace. A confident man would rather be admired and respected by his family than get props from the streets. The streets have love for no man.
  •  A woman wants a confident man because along with that confidence will come dignity. A man with dignity will do the right thing even when his woman isn't around. He will not freely give himself to another woman and jeopardize taking home a disease or a baby.  He wants to be worthy of honor and respect, and the mere thought of ripping his woman's heart and losing her honor and respect would crush his spirit.
  •  A confident man takes his responsibility as a father seriously and this is what a woman wants and needs in her life. One of the most significant feats in life for a confident man is leaving a deep rooted legacy. Majority of the time-the seeds of the legacy are left within his children. They don’t necessarily have to be his biological children, but the children that he raises and gives his love, wisdom, and time to.
  •  A woman needs a confident man because he will look for opportunities to praise her. Though he is the head, he won’t feel intimidated if his woman is shining. As a matter of act he will put her in the spotlight most times and make sure to be her biggest supporter. When a woman has a supportive man, she brags on how supportive he is. It’s a win- win for him. A woman needs praise from her man just as a child needs it from their father. It’s something about the bass in his voice and the power behind it that boosts a woman’s adrenaline in all the right ways.
  •  A woman wants and needs a confident man because, for him, physical and verbal abuse is not an option. He won’t take it off of her; and he most definitely won’t be the abuser. A confident man will also be a wise man and will possess skills which enables him to express frustration and anger in a non-abusive way. Only weak men with no confidence abuse women. They lack anger management, self-control, and the ability to express feelings verbally.
  •  A woman needs a confident man because he doesn’t get jealous when other men look her way. He knows what his woman is packing, which this is the reason he chose her. A confident man will trust his woman because he's taking care of his business at home in more ways than one.
  •  A confident man will pray for and with his woman, he will listen to her concerns, he’ll see her as a partner, he’ll be patient during her time of the month, he’ll be honest, trustworthy and loyal. He’ll be her best friend as well as her rock.

Sunday, April 27, 2014

Use your confidence to past the finish line

The truth about my flaws...They're perfect!

 




         I am so amazed, refreshed, and relieved to have finally learned the wonderful truth about my individuality and uniqueness. I didn’t just stumble over this truth, but I sought out this truth because I always knew it was there. I had a constant nagging and tugging deep in my soul which kept me restless until I discovered (or uncovered) what was always here in front of me. Are you eager to know what it is?

     This might blow your mind so you may need to strap down. If you have to stop reading this until you get in the car or somewhere that has a seat belt, I’ll wait……………

Okay, are you ready???

     First, I have a question that I would like for you to answer. Do you have any flaws? I hope to heaven that your answer is no!

      Well, I have discovered that my SO CALLED flaws are exactly what makes me so awesome. My SO CALLED flaws are what makes me….perfect! But everywhere I look there are images of what perfection should look like, and I am constantly being reminded that my SO CALLED flaws should be corrected in order for me to be considered perfect. Or shall I say, I’d been tricked to believe that perfection is looking, acting, and living how society says I should.
   
     The more you compare your individuality and uniqueness to what society says is perfect, the more you will look to doctors, television, celebrities, and media for the magic eraser that will take your true identity away. The more you look to those things for a solution, the more control society has over you. Let me be quit clear about this; accepting and appreciating your uniqueness means that you go against society's views. 
     
     What sets me apart from you? What sets you apart from your mother or father? What sets us apart from our friends? It’s our SO CALLED flaws that sets us apart from the rest of the world.  As a matter of fact, they are not flaws at all; they're our gifts. Our differences, challenges, uniqueness, size, looks, complexion, the way we walk, our body type, hair texture, eye color, size of our nose…you know, those things;  aren’t suppose to have any specific format, structure, size or design in order to be perfect. My large nostrils, and dark complexion, C shaped ears, loud laugh, sarcastic humor, and so many other things about me is my special mixture. We all are made up of the same ingredients but mixed as different recipe's. Every human is made up of his or her own unique recipe that makes them who they are; therefore, no one was created to look like, act like, live like, or desire what anyone else has.

    Society programs us to think there’s a specific blueprint of how we should look, act, and live in order for our  lives to be great. But the truth is that we are great when we're  born! Success is in us from day one regardless of how many SO CALLED flaws we have. Unplug yourself from society’s outlet and plug into the universe. Erase the idea that your individual uniqueness are flaws and uncover the truth for yourself.



                                                  THE END…….

Saturday, April 26, 2014

Irresponsible couple murdered after fight put on Facebook


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Senseless murder is not news for many of us because we see it in the media all of the time. I've personally seen a man beat almost to death on the back of metro Bi-state bus over...guess...Jordan sneakers!
We can't seem to go one day without turning on the television and hearing about someone whose had their life taken over something quit futile.
In this story, a neighborhood fight that was recorded and plastered all over facebook may now be a link to finding the person/people responsible for the murder of a young couple.
This story of James and Danielle Alexander is saddest to me, though not uncommon, because here we have a married couple who was murdered and discovered by one of their children. Can you imagine?
What kind of lifestyle did this couple have? Did they choose to live a life for their children that exemplified self respect and self confidence? I'm not judging this couple because I think this is very sad and no one deserves to have their life taken over a simple street fight, but the careless, irresponsible, and quit dysfunctional decision that was made by the now deceased mother shows her irresponsibility. She not only fought in the streets in front of her home, but she posted the fight on Facebook and boasted about it.


A woman with self-confidence will always keep in the forefront of her mind how her behavior affects her children, and will act responsibly. A confident woman believes in her ability to be great. She can't be great when the hi-light of her week is posting a fight on Facebook of a beat down that she gave to another young woman. Don't believe me, look at her results. She can't be great if she is dead and leaves behind 4 young children.

Wednesday, April 23, 2014

8 Reasons a man wants a confident woman



       8 Reasons a Man Wants a Confident Woman
          Ladies, the very popular quote holds truth: Behind every good man is a great woman: and if you’re in a relationship with a good man, then you know exactly how to interpret this statement. Guess what? Men understand this statement also- and maybe even more than women.
The main quality that a woman must possess in order to be great is– Confidence. That’s right, the good old ‘C’ word. When a man has a vision and he realizes his greatness, he will eventually want a woman who has what it takes to help bring life to that vision. He’ll begin to look for a lover, a friend, a soul mate, a supporter, a partner- his wife! He’ll not only need a woman that can hold him down but he’ll want a confident woman who can lift him up. Here are 8 reasons a man wants and needs a confident woman.

1. A confident woman will be very patient and understanding while her man is trying to bring his vision to life. When a man is passionate about his vision he may put in long hours until he cracks the surface. His woman will make sure their surroundings are in order so that he may put quality focus on the plan. A woman who lacks confidence will feel rejected and take things personal when her man has to spend long days working and/or traveling. A woman without confidence will spend more time focusing on what her man isn’t doing right rather than understanding that he’s developing.


2. A confident woman will feel secure in her relationship because she understands that her man is doing what he’s doing for his family. When a woman is secure in her relationship she won’t be tempted to give up the gushy goods to someone else. She will have the ‘us’ attitude and her validation will come from her self-worth. A woman without confidence will have the ‘me’ attitude because her focus is on being validated by her man or even another man.

3. Confident women take pride in their appearance. Nice hair, a little make-up from time to time, nice properly fitting clothes, pedicure and manicure when necessary, and a regular workout routine to keep herself healthy are all ways for a woman to take pride in her appearance. When a woman looks good, she feels good, and when she feels good - that woman wants to make her man feel good in every way.

4. There is something about a woman who has brains to go with her beauty. A confident woman reads and educates herself on a regular basis. Toxic television shows, useless conversations, negative friends, and no interest in learning new things, are NOT often associated with confident women. A confident woman looks for new things to learn and is eager to bring them to her man.

5. A confident woman knows how to tap dance in the rain. This means that she is able to face adversity and most challenges without completely becoming the ‘B’ word. The word that rhymes with…uhhh…I think you get it. When a man is grinding and trying to make a dollar out of 15 cents he will definitely face some challenges along the way. His woman should be able to hold it together so that he can keep a clear head.  He has no time to constantly calm her down and stay focused on what he needs to do.  

6. A confident woman knows the power of submission. Being submissive does not mean giving your power away, it means the opposite. Hey, we didn’t make the rules we just need to follow them. The man is the head and has a major role in the family. He has to provide, protect, and pro create with his woman. The responsibility of a good man is major and his woman shows her love by respecting his role and submitting. She knows that her man was built with a back strong enough to carry 2 tons of bricks (figuratively). As he carries her on his back, she wipes his sweat and gives him water. Therefore he can see where he’s going and stay replenished so that he may endure to the end.

7. But she also knows how to be firm when necessary. A confident woman will not be intimidated by her man, nor will she be passive. She sees herself in him and will not want to see him defeated. In a loving way she will inform him when her heart is heavy and recommend that he  turns from doing something he will regret. A good man will listen.


8. Overall, a man wants a confident woman because her strength along with her loyalty to him is what keeps him going.

Tuesday, April 22, 2014

It takes confidence to love a stranger




   

       I decided to grab a bite to eat while out shopping at the mall this past weekend. As I scanned the different food vendors menu's and was trying to carefully make my choice as if picking out a pair of shoes, I'd suddenly lost my appetite. One minute I was starving and my stomach was singing 'Feed me Seymour' and the next minute the smell of the food court was just making me nauseous.
     I knew that my appetite would eventually come back so I decided to grab something anyway. I randomly chose this little grilled sub sandwich shop to keep it simple. As I was waiting for the sandwich my attention moved from the sandwich on the grill to the guy cooking it. I noticed how happy he was and how wide his smile extended. I hadn't seen a smile that big in a while; not even on my own face. I couldn't help but to start a conversation with him and join in on the delight of his inner joy.
     From speaking with this 21 year old gentleman for about 7 minutes I learned that his 60 year old father was dying from cancer, his mother had passed several years earlier from pneumonia, he had to drop out of school to get a job to help his father, and they were about to be evicted from their apartment because lack of sufficient income; yet he was the most positive person I'd encountered that day.
     I walked away with my perfectly crafted sub sandwich in one hand and my department store bags full of cute clothes in the other, and had every reason to have a smile on my face; but I didn't. I was irritated because I splurged a little too much on shopping, grumpy because I'd lost my appetite but wanted to stuff my face with a juicy 3 pound burger, and pissed that I had to walk another 10 minutes to my car from the food court. Yet, this young man who had every reason to be negative-wasn't.
     When I finally made it to my car I sat for a few minutes and thought about this guy. I wondered if there was a particular reason we crossed paths. Had it not been for me losing my appetite I probably would've chosen a juicy 3 pound burger and missed out on an opportunity to meet a very special guy. This young man was truly a blessing to meet and I thank God for these moments. I realized that I cared about that guy and sincerely wished him the best outcome for his circumstances. But something tells me that he will be just fine.